Saturday, 12 July 2008

Board Book Process pages 1 and 2 cont

Here is the work I have done on my board book pages 1 & 2. To see the stage before this click here. I don't know if these are finished. 

Perhaps you are wondering why my board book has "DeeDee" written all over it. I would be. The truth is that DeeDee is not the name I go by. I haven't been called DeeDee for the past 28 years. As I grew up in the U.S., no one in Australia knows me by that name.

I am not on the run. I haven't done anything I am overly ashamed of. I just changed my name.

Then I went to a wonderful spiritual healer who said that I needed to reintegrate with my childhood name. Well, that isn't exactly what she said. She asked if I would be willing to go back to DeeDee. I'm not. The truth is it makes me feel too vulnerable. It brings back that not very happy little girl and the pain I have tried to leave behind.

But I also see that now I am strong enough to reintegrate with that child and her pain. Hence I am using DeeDee in some areas of my life. I have asked a few friends that I feel safe with to call me DeeDee. It is difficult for them to remember.

So that is why my board book has DeeDee written all over it. It is my healing scrapbook board book.


Connie said...

Names are very powerful. I just left a message on Vicki's post with the pictures of her grandparents...explaining the power my name has had for me in my life. Check it out. You should never take your name lightly...there is a lot of energy you carry around in those simple configurations of letters.

Kids at school I'll sometimes say their name wrong for like months until they have the courage to tell the "teacher" that I have been saying it wrong. I really try to explain to them how important it is to correct people right away. Your name is yours--own with it you wish...but own it all the same.

DeeDee, I really like your blog. It's good stuff.

Peace & Love.

Jerdleluvsjapan said...

I wish you all the best in your healing, deedee. Your board book looks great. I love this page.

nollyposh said...

Well DeeDee... You are bEaUtIfUL little DeeDee to mE X:-) and now you are "Suzi Blu FaMoUs DeeDee" too! X:-) Now isn't that just a lovely acknowledgment for your beautiful sketch X:-)...
I have a gorgeous cousin who has just recently changed her name too... And to me she it is all about who you feel that you are... She has evolved into her spiritual name she says and you can sEE that this is true... Yep a name is a powerful thing for sure and l have always been interested in the numerology of them... When l married both my maiden and married names were curiously the same in numerology... Healing the past the way you are through reconnecting this way l bet is a powerful thing... Names hold such energy and nicnames too... My nic said a LOT about me when l looked to my childhood for healing... My cousin actually said that she never felt that she ever 'fit' in her name and there was even controversy between her parents over her naming at birth... It can be such a scarey thing this naming business... I have often wondered if we grow into our names of if WE shape them? I suspect that they shape us... Afteral when have you ever met a "Vicki" that wasn't a chatter box!!! X;-o! *Hugs* Vicki x

DeeDee said...

Yeah, names, it is mysterious.
Having had a name I 'gave' myself for the past 23 years, I still can't say how much it has shaped me. But I suspect more than I bargained for.
I didn't actually give myself my present name, someone else gave it to me. I am sure the story will come out eventually. Forgive me, I am not being coy, I am just not ready to go there.

Anonymous said...

We have always called my youngest sister DD, but her adult friends and family call her Diane, which is her name. She answers to both and doesn't seem to have a problem:-)