Tuesday, 18 November 2008

Saturn Journal Pages


I seem to be on a bit of a pink run at the moment. I have other moods and colours in process, these were just the ones that I have finished. I started these pages over a month ago. They stayed at the border stage for ages.
Click on the pages if you want to see them larger. 
I had already gessoed these pages with white gesso. It isn't necessary but it gives you a different, less slippery, surface to work on. The gesso also adds strength. Then I painted them with acrylic paint. I wasn't worried about getting them evenly painted as I like a bit of texture.
In my "Creativity will Change Your Life" class we had tried out frottage, or making rubbings. Basically you just put a piece of paper on top of some uneven surface and rub a crayon (or other mark-making tool) over the surface. I ended up with some not terribly interesting rubbings so I cut them up to make a border for this page. The solid green and pink bits are done with water soluable crayons.
I like working with black and white photocopies. The woman in the 80's shoulder pads is me when I was 27. I drew in a couch for me to sit on with white gel pen. The little cutie in the upper right is a photo of my sister as a child.
The wonderful goddess face is a portrayal of Saturn I cut from a magazine. Whoever made it gave Saturn dragon wings. Isn't that interesting?
The little birdies on a teapot are from a birthday card. I soaked the cutout in water for ten minutes so that I could peel away some of the card as I didn't want it too thick. 
Then I added some writing that I had in my notebook. It is a message from a day when I had asked about getting older. I had noticed that I no longer get the same attention from men, even men my own age. I was a little annoyed that it bothered me.
It was only later that I noticed how well the subject of the writing went with the Saturn planet and the photo of the younger me. I love that chance aspect.

As you can't read the writing, I will add it here if anyone is interested:
It is true that you are struggling with self-worth in this life. And you have lots of company. You are not unusual in that regard. Perhaps with less confidence than most in terms of the worldly, but you are approaching it at a much deeper level than most. 
Be compassionate with yourself. Out of a kind of necessity, some of your confidence was based on the shaky foundation of youth and beauty and the false power of that. You certainly didn't use that power the way many have, or even emphasised it much. That will work in your favour now; that is a kind of karma as well. You did not feed your vanity to a great extent and that makes this transition easier.
Still, there will be small losses. Blows to the vanity. And the resentments that will bring up. Use this opportunity to see how the entire artiface works. Try to see everyone with compassion. It is easy to become bitter, to see women as abused and resent men. Women are abused, but we all pay for the predjudice. We will all become old, so how stupid is it for us to hate the elderly?
It is a time to unwind all this. A slow unwinding that you are only just beginning. Watch and see where you are afraid of humiliation.

14 comments:

luthien said...

how interesting... the 27 year old you looked as if it came straight out of a magazine! we all get glimpses of 'feeling unattractive' ... i dun think any girl... or as a matter of fact anybody can avoid that. i guess we just have to make peace with the fact that everyone will have a chance to grow old... as everyone would have been young and attractive once :) you're still as cool as ever zom!

luthien said...

totally totally profound words that every human being should keep in mind :)

Zom said...

Thank you for your vote of 'coolness'. I am flattered. I don't think I was cool when young, so there you go. :)

rlm studios said...

thanks for sharing this!!! i love the pages you did

mrsb said...

I love the pinks and greens together. I thought for sure when I first saw the page, the border came first, with the pink painted on top! It's just beautful.

Craft Junkie said...

Don't you love the freedom you feel when doing an art journal page or pages? It's like art just for arts sake and there is no reason to fear so we're just free to create...and your creation here is wonderful! (Love those 80's shoulder pads, too, btw. LOL)
Peace & Love,
~Barb~

Chris said...

Wow! I'm glad you posted a comment on my blog, because now I can visit you often. It is cool how you show your process. Thank you!

Kimberly said...

Nice work!

Kimberly

Zom said...

I do love the freedom of my art journal craft junkie. It is so much play, and so different from my studio 'work'.
I think I feel a post coming on, lol.
Where do I go to see your journal pages, craft junkie?

~ maggie crawford ~ said...

oh
you so inspire me..
i need to start journaling!!

the pink looks like cotton candy & i totally love your drawn in couch..
wonderful!!

maggie

Tashai said...

Hi Zom,
I have nominated you for the uber amazing blog award. See details on my blog. :)

Sydney said...

Love the pink and green. And on a completely different level love love loved (and can relate to) the things you wrote beneath the paint and pastings.

Vicki Holdwick said...

Zom,

I find lots of inspiration from your blog. Thanks.

By the way, you've been tagged. Visit my blog to see what that entails.

Renee said...

I'm hearing what you are saying. Age comes to all of us at some point and the beauty of youth to me does not fade, it blooms into a different kind of beauty with age.

You were beautiful then and I think you are gorgeous now.

Peace

Renee