Being an artist has two sides. There is the creative side, in your studio making the work - with all its wonders, tortures, delights and challenges .
The other side is the Art World. Finding a gallery (or not), trying to sell your work, dealing with people who seem to have the power, trying to feel successful and dealing with your own ego. Trying not to get disheartened. Trying to achieve a balance of believing in your work but not becoming an egomaniac. Making peace with the distinct possibility of never making a living wage. And so on.
That is the world I have been in this week. I have been quite anxious, getting a portfolio together for a networking event. I have also been anxious putting together paintings for a group show. Both are good things. The networking went really well. There was an encouraging amount of interest in my work.
I am quite happy, but I am also grumpy. I feel frazzled and drained. I want to be in my studio working again. But I need to confirm my new contacts, send out more photos of paintings - research galleries that have been recommended to me, and phone those galleries. And then send out more photos.
I am really happy and very grateful, but I miss my studio. And I miss my art journal. I want to go back into my creating and forget about the business side of art.