What started it was the other day I was clearing out files and ran across some old photos when I was in my mid-20's. It can be a bit of a shock to remember that you ever looked so young. And so good. (and in my case, sad, but that is another story.)Gee, even the shape of our face changes as we age.
Anyway, it was just there in my consciousness when the next evening there is a program on cosmetic surgery. It is a reporter trying out all this stuff, botox, laser - she doesn't actually get to the knife, but she does get 50 injections of botox! And a full on laser treatment, blood oozing from her skin. But it works. She looks younger and prettier.
And you know how it is. I am not seriously considering it, but I do pull up the skin on my lower jaw and see a bit of that 26 year old return. Sigh.
Then this morning, eating my breakfast across the table from my DH of 22 years, I think 'how would I feel if he got plastic surgery to look younger?'
And I know right away that I wouldn't like it. Why? Because I love this face, this person, that he has become. He may not be as handsome as when we met, but the truth is that I love him more than I did 20 years ago. And I would miss the face he has now.
It isn't until later in the day that I think 'what about loving myself that same way?' Do I love myself who I am now? Would I feel the same sadness to see her gone for some face younger and prettier?
You know, I am happy to say that I am pretty sure I would.